A woman walks into a bar.

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So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of this joke, but your mom is a whore.

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"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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why did the baby stop crying his mother killed him with an axe

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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What do you call a a chinese abortion? My dinner

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why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

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A blonde, a Jew, and a black man all went to the store. They each bought their groceries and went home to enjoy the rest of their day with their families.

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god sent down his only son, " his only son." so in gods eyes we are a bunch of girls.

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

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Two kids are playing basketball. One says to the other, "FAILMUFFIN!" The basketball flies out of bounds.

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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What did Rihanna remember when she corrected Chris Browns tweets she can't remember last thing she saw was a fist

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can you pass the soap?

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Knock knock Who's there? Barack obama

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Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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