Why did the chicken cross the road? To be eaten.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

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Golf.

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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Roses are red, The grass is greener, Every time i'm with you, I touch my wiener.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

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Did the Jewish surgeon charge extra for circumcisions? Nope, he just kept the tips

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What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

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Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops