If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I don't know, i was wondering if you knew.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Golf.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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Who's gay? Justin Beaver

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What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

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A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well I'll tell you. He was happily gliding down the sidewalk when he realized that his destination was across the road. He then proceeds to take In his surroundings . He finds that there is no indication telling him to stop so he then cautiously walks across the road watching for any dangerous movement. He safely makes it across and proceeds to his destination which is the slaughtering house. He is a retarded chicken

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How do you drown a blonde? Weigh her down and throw her into a body of water.

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

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Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops