Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

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star wars kid

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What happens when you fire a machine gun clip into a jew? You are convicted on first degree murder, and most likely sentenced to jail because you can't afford a good lawyer. Orange jumpsuits are uncomfortable.

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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A white guy, a black guy, an asian guy, an indian sit together. Canada

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops