What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

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whats long, fat, and people love it in their mouth? blunts.

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What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy.

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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What did the man on the moon say? Nothing. He died because his supply of oxygen ran out.

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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Why was the black kid at school? Because he wanted to receive an education.

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What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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Q: a black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? A: The mexican. They're going to the bookstore to get some books.

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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