A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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