How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

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How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

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A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

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Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

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Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

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What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

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Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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2 biggest lies I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service and That baby dont look like me

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops