What happened to the couple that got married? They went on their honeymoon.

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If i was gay... I would have strong sexual feelings towards peolple of the same sex as me

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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What did the cheerleader get for christmas? Money, because she's a stupid w hore

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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your life

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

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Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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roses are red poo is poo

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If God created the world, including man kind, why do we worship him? We are corrupt, selfcentered, animal slaughterers. He made us this. So, Why?

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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