Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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A kid walks into a bar He gets kicked out

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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Why didn't the mexican have a job? because he was working on his masters degree

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eh dylan quieres que te trolle de nuevo

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Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

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An orphan falls off a cliff.

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what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

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Whats the difference between garlic bread and a Jewish person? Garlic bread doesn't scream in the oven.

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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What do you call a human with no eye? A Human.

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Albert your flies undone.

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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penis

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

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What do you call an African-American picking cotton and harvesting wheat. A farmer.

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Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

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Whats the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar, he doesn't let a minor disablity distract him from having a good time.

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What happens when you get your leg caught in an elevator door? Nothing. It is likely that the elevator has advanced sensory components that won't allow the door to close on your leg.

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Q: Did you hear that Hollywood actress got stabbed last night? A: Really? Which one? Q: Reese.. um wither.. withersomething A: Witherspoon? Q: Yes. Her. She's in a critical condition.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One is plastic and dangerous to children. The other holds groceries.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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