why was six afraid of seven? Because seven brutally murdered six's family

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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Why was the boy adopted........ because hes grandad

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A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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Whats red, black and brown? My anus after a Friday night

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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