How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

Potassium? K.

a man walks into a bar, it hurt.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

A Black man, and Jewish man, and a Asian man walk into a bar. They then proceed to buy a drink, leave the bar, and move on with their day.

Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

What do you say when a black person is walking through wal-mart? Prisoner

Q: Why Marc can't run? A: Marc is a leaf.

Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

Why was the teenage girl bleeding from her vagina? Because I had shot her in her vagina with my gun earlier that day.

What do Jerry Sandusky and Michael Jackson have in common? They both had sex with little boys.

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

how do you make a boy cry you cut out his eyes

whats 1 + 1? 2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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