How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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haha black people :D

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face" The horse responds "My daughter has cancer"

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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