Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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