A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

stinky boner

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

It's likely that very few people will read this.

A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

roses are black violets are black i am blind

What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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