Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

Q: If your riding down the Nile on a boat and your boat springs a leak, how many boxes of pancake mix does it take to fix the hole? A: 58, because Koalas are marsupials

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

The way I see it, you are pretty lucky I am a tough guy, the kind you like. Anyway you where really wondering if I ever refer myself as a boy? Sigh, I mean I AM A BOY! WHAT? WHAT? Savage jokes? What jokes?

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

why is brennan hart a dumbass idk ask his mom

why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...