Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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What does a Cuban do when he gets a flat tire? He pulls over and replaces it.

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What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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what happened when joey asked the teacher to go to the restroom? The Teacher said "yes you may go to the restroom," not even putting into consideration that joey was a ginger and discriminating him because of it.

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

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What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

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Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

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Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

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I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

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My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

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What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops