why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

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What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

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golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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Why did the black man cross the road? To rape the girl on the other side.

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How did the man escape the giant scorpion? He didn't he watched as his family died and waited for his demise crying in the corner of the scorpion's layer

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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