Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

a man walked into a bar today he suffers from depression from his wife leaving him and taking custody of the children on the grounds that he is an alcoholic and is unfit to raise children

What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

What did the empty bar stool say to the one next to him? "You look like you have a lot on your shoulders!"

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

why was the little boy screaming. he realized he was an asian

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

*knock knock* i have diarrhea

How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

why were maddie and maddy and rachel and jill all friends? we all enjoy pizza

Knock, knock. MAN: Who's there? ... MAN: Hello? Anyone out there? ... MAN: Must be the wind.

Q: What do you call a innocent black man that was shot 403 times by the cops when they asked for his ID and somehow assumed he was gonna reach for a gun? A: Deceased Texan.

why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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