My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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9/11 my birthday

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+funny&hl=en&safe=active&biw=1024&bih=398&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=lc8_fNCatYHOqM:&imgrefurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/harry-being-typical-harry/&docid=86Gw8eNJ73tOYM&imgurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/cms/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/harry-styles-300.jpg&w=300&h=400&ei=q4vHT9XwHYL48gSJoJzJDw&zoom=1

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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