What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

so you're waling through the desert and a tire falls off your canoe. How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse?

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

Apple hates Blackberry.

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

Why did Sarah fall of the swing... She had no arms. Knock knock, who's there... Not Sarah. Face Face, who's there... Probably Sarah.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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