I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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civil rights

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

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What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

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so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

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What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

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like if your cool

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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