What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

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Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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What's 9+10? 19

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

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Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

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Why is my brother so bad at making anti jokes cuz HE HAS a sense of humor

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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If Oscar Meyer had a dog what kind of dog would it be? A Wiener Dog!!

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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