What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Yo mamma is so ugly, but your father was willing to look past that. They fell in love and you were born about a year after they got married.

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What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

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What's worse than carrying a heavy suitcase? Poisoning children.

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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Two Muffins are in a freezer. The first muffin says "Sure is cold in here." The other muffin sits there untill at a later date eaten because muffins can't talk. The first muffin later is analyzed and dysected by the United States governmant and is classified as alien because again, muffins can't talk.

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Why did the fat Jew cross the road? To go to the bicycle shop to fix his puncture

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Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

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What does a ghost get when he watches porn? A boner

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

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Wright flyer

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Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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What's worse than getting murdered? Getting murdered twice? - Louis

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why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

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Why did Bob fall off the swim? He had no arms or legs.

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Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

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What'd the mexican get for his birthday, birthday cards from his friends and family.

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Q: If you are debating whether to smoke marijuana, consider: what will your mother say when she finds your corpse? A: As a relatively harmless and non-addictive substance, Marijuana was most likely not the cause of my child’s death. It was probably AIDS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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