How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

roses are red vilest are blue shes mine and if you take my place my fist will go in your face

knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

I can prove I'm a psychic - this post is going to receive a lot of dislikes.

Q: Why was the Asian teacher fired from her job? A: Because she always showed to school too late and to make matters worse the school had recently found out that she was a raging alcoholic.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

Why did the Soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin in the air.

Why did the chicken cross the road? How am I supposed to know?

Why is a duck? Because one leg is both the same.

why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

Q: Why did the baby cross the road? A: Because it was stapled to the chicken.

Why was the black man running down the street with a suitcase? He was late for work.

What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

What's black and white and red all over? A panda with red paint splattered on it

Why are there so many blacks in prison? *The rest of this joke has been removed to avoid causing offence*

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus

Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

Why did the blonde get a tattoo of her adress on her arm? She never wanted to forget her great childhood at her family home, and she hoped that she would come back some day.

What do you call a man with no legs, arms, or a head? A torso.

Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

Your mother is so fat that LOWERLOWEOROLWERLOWEH OIRH OWER IOWEJ OR OIJWE :JWEJKLR

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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