If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

two men write a poem one says quack the other says woof what is the middle of the number witch is amazing because who ever is reading this you are beautiful and have chucken food ion your cheek bone connected to the knee cap indeed i shall write on to you guys saying how lovley it is TO MAKE FIRENDS WITH CHICKENS

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

My closet is like the wardrobe to Narnia, accept my closet isnt a portal into a magical world.

Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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