Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

Why did the bus drop his icecream? He was hit by a boy

What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, the other is a lawyer

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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