In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

Your mamma so jobless, that she needs a job! ~T.J.C.S.

Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed because of the fact that he had lost World War II.

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

Hey! Do you like fishsticks? Me too :)

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

How do you starve a black man?.........take away his food!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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