Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

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a ginger named corey walks into a bad and gets pistol whipped after raping his classmate

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A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

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knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

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Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

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Uh... You know them N words... When they come crashing into the neiborhood the neiborhood quality drops and gets totally destroyed youknow what im sayan? Uh yeah sure totally... Then you know they spread around smell up dirty and toxicify the whole area, they become so fat and loud and like take everything away from you. Yeah HEIL KKK!! WUUT? I was talking Aboot them Nukular warheds! You you... SOMETHING! Hey! Dont get offensive man, sorry I was just KIDDING!... yeah... KIDDIIING!

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There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops