Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

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Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

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Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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So this chick meets a guy at a bar. They never greet each other and the drive home sober.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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An Irishman walked out of a bar

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Why was the man in a great deal of pain? Because he was hit in the face with a sack of potatoes.

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Why did Marilyn Manson surgically remove 2 ribs from his body? To suck his own penis.

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What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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How did the idiot die? He comitted suicide because people were picking on his stupidity. (If you laughed at this you are a horrible person)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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