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Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

The way I see it, you are pretty lucky I am a tough guy, the kind you like. Anyway you where really wondering if I ever refer myself as a boy? Sigh, I mean I AM A BOY! WHAT? WHAT? Savage jokes? What jokes?

Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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