- Anti Joke

Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

Where do penguins keep their money? No where. Penguins don't have a money economy

The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

why did I fall off a tree? cause i wanna to

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

roses are red violets are blue ill keep u in my heart forever and ower baby to

2 penguins in a tub. one looks to the other an says, "pass the bar of soap." the other looks at him.."what do you think i am, a typewriter?"

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

Me: Wanna play a game of red light and as I get closer to you, you get to call red light?? girl: Yea! okay, go! girl: green light!! Me: Sorry, firetrucks don't stop for red lights

Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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