What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

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Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

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Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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What did Tiger Woods do when he saw a woman taking her shirt off? He looked the other way so he could make his birdie putt

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

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Whats alive and drowning? your new born baby you just threw in the river

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

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Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

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Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

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Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

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A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

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what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

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There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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