Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

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if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

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I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

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A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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