a. why? b. because I wanted

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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There are only three kind of people: people who can count and people that can't count

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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So a man walks into a bar, right?

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Why did the man cross the road? Because the light was red!

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"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

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Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops