Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

my penis

Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

Q: What did the police officer tell the man without a shirt on? A: Put a shirt on.

Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

An Anthony eats a juicy pickle.

There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

Why did the Black man buy some slaves? They were his family

My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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