Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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123 f*ck off

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

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There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

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An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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What did the chicken say to the cow? Cluck cluck Knock knock Who's there Chicken Chicken who? Chicken go cluck cluck, cow go moo Piggie go oink oink, how 'bout you?

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12 in general

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops