A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops