One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

What's bigger than a breadbox? Whitney Houston's coffin.

Knock knock knock OCD

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

What happened to the boy who stalked the pretty girl? His father raped him and he died in a house fire induced by his overwhelmingly sick love for the taliban

My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

What happens if you come across an elephant in the jungle?. You wipe it up What happens if an elephants comes across you in the jungle? Swim

Your mom is so fat her daily calorie intake is dangerously above the recommended 2000 per day.

Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

A man jumps of the roof of his building. The superindentant now owns the building and the man who jumped off the building has 59 fractures. Oh and he died.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Arnold Schwarzenegger at Terminator: Gaynysis (or whatever I wont bother checking that out) YA NEED TO REMUV THE QUANTANAMO TRANSLACATOR TO RELOCALIZAYSEE THE INTERDEEMENENTIONAL MAYTREX! Yes, Pops but what about the time travel Paradox? YOU NEEED TO REMOV THE CRISTAL PALARDOXAL WARCALIBREITOR IN ORDA TO DESINSTONYSE THE DEEMENTIAL CORDALOXEY! Me: *Leaving the cinema* Moral: If you thought the trailer was like "meh", then you will soon realize it was the best part off the movie... The only part that is meh, and while I can honestly say I dont understand shit about how timelines work in Terminator (The creators dont do it either) Having Arnold Fucking Swartsnigger go with the Geek lingo DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! To explain things to me, NOTHIIIIING!

Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

What starts with P and ends with ORN? Porn

dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...