What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

Why did the man with no arms or legs fall out of the tree? Because he got shot.

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

Dick Cheney That's the joke

Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

A apple a day keeps gramar away.

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Anything you like, he's blind.

Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...