If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

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Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? It had no wings.

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Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

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Whats worse than suicide? death

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Nothing, they're both horses

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

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What do you call a blonde driving the wrong way down the freeway? Well that depends on what her parents named her, or whether she happens to have a nickname of sorts.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

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Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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