Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

Why did the monkey cross the road? Because he saw the chicken do it.

Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? No I said Lou. Oh hey Lou come on in.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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