why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? Pay a reasonable sum of money.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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A catholic priest and Jerry Sandusky walk out of an elementary school.

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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Whats worse than driving a Ford Taurus? Driving two Ford Taurus'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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What's as hard as a rock? A rock

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing.

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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Why was Tommy late for school? He got raped by spiderman.

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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How do I become successful like you dad? Just do good.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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