How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

What Do call a dog with an e A doge

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

Why was the boy at the funeral? Because he was dead.

A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

ur gey

What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

Whats bad about being a black jew? You have to sit in the back on the oven.............

What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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