what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

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He is outside, running for it, Erron, seriously who is We? I thought you where an author.

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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Why did the Jew cross the road? Cause the Nazi told him to

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What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

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what do u call a black men standing on top of a church. holy shit

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.

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What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

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What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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whats your name whats the color of the sky whats the oppisite of down

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Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

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What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

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Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

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Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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