God is real.

a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

Roses are Razzmatazz Violets are Arsenic These colors are weird Cancer.

Why didn't the boy cross the road? Because there was traffic moving at high speed and he didn't want to be paralyzed from the waist down

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Pfft. Stupid. Apples are for healthy people. Go for the ice cream. There's no worms in that.

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

A Catholic, a Protestant, and a Jew are stranded in the middle of the ocean on a raft. They all die of dysentery.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

Why couldn't the boy in the wheelchair sue the man making fun of him? Because he couldn't get up the stairs to court.

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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