Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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What word is 7 letters long, is composed of the letters N,G,G,E,R, and S, and stands for a group of people who annoy the crap out of you? NAGGERS.

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Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

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What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

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How did the hairless cat brush its hair? It could not, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs, making it near impossible to do such a thing.

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

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Why was Mary's turkey dry on Thanksgiving dinner? Because she left it in the oven too long.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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Ed Milliband knows what's best for the UK.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

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Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops