Why did the old man get the anti aging cream ? He failed 8th grade 50 times.

Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

Why was Little Billy crying? He had cancer. Why was Little Sally crying? Little Billy's cancer was contagious.

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

what did the cat say to the potato? meow

Knock knock. Who's there? Tim. Tim who? Tim Smith.

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...