why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

A Catholic, a Protestant, and a Jew are stranded in the middle of the ocean on a raft. They all die of dysentery.

Why couldn't the boy in the wheelchair sue the man making fun of him? Because he couldn't get up the stairs to court.

Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

What can a Giraffe have, that no other animal on Earth can? A baby Giraffe.

What did hitler said to the chinese? Thank you for continuing my legacy.

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

A lot eh?

Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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