Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

How did Bella fly? Very badly.

In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

Why did the pirate have a peg leg? Diabetes

What is the last thing to go through a flies head before it hits a windshield. Nothing because flies aren't capable if rational thought.

What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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