What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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Two girls are backpacking in the Sierra Nevada. They walk 8 km from their base camp at a bearing of 42 degrees. After lunch, they document the wildlife they have seen because they are tracking the populations of species native to the area. Then they continue on their hike, but this time at a bearing of 127 degrees. After 5 km, they reach their destination for the day and set up a temporary camp.

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An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

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Why couldn't Horton hear a who? He was a loaf of bread.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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I slept through the Dark Knight movie....turns out I was pretty tired.

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A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no reason. Chickens don't have the thinking skills to reason.

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How many different ways can you kill a cat? 27, unless you live in Russia then it's 28

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

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What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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How do you kill a dumb blonde? Personally, I love stabbing them.

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Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

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Why do midgets wear condoms? To avoid unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops