What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Some chocolate and a new DVD.

There are three guys on an airplane, a Korean, a Mexican, and an American. The pilot comes on the speaker and syays,"The plane is to heavy, throw out the thing you have most in your country." The Korean throws out an AK-47 and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The Mexican throws out a taco and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The American throws out the Mexican and says,"We have to many of these in our country."

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Remember Y2K? That could have been bad.

what did the chicken say when it crossed the road? you know. chickens arent the only animal that can cross roads! why can it be why did the racoon cross the roads? because that happens more frequently!

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

how many black people can you fit in a car? However many sets there are.

Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

Guess what What

Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

Every circle of friends has a "crazy one". If you can't figure out who the "crazy one" in your group is... Try harder. Either that or you are a terrible judge of character.

What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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