Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

Knock Knock Who’s there? Tom Tom who? Tom Pearson? Oh Tom, I wasn’t expecting you til 3pm, please come in.

you will like this because i am black.

What did lil' Bobby get for christmas? Cancer.

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? It varies. Alzheimer's is a very slow progressing disease, and many people suffering from it are capable of a wide variety of a number of everyday activities.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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