alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

hi

What's the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The anti-Joke isn't a freaking joke. So stop freaking doing it!

There are 3 Chinese guys migrating to the USA, Chu, Bu and Fu. . Chu added a 'ck' to? his name and became Chuck Bu did the same thing and became Buck. Fu got sent back to china

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

What did the student say to the teacher, after being assigned homework? This isn't my best subject, can I stay after class for tutoring?

Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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