What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

What happened to the Jew who went to France? He had a very enjoyable time and visited many of the remarkable landmarks around the country.

i saw amango it splootered

Smoke Day, Every Weed.

What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

2 sheeps are outside having a great time One sheep walks up to the other sheep and says: hello The other sheep says: hello Now what I want to know: what ally do you get your drugs from

Knock knock. Who's there? Ed. Ed who? Ed Begley Jr.

Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

What do you do if you see a cat crossing the street? Hit it of course!

what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

what do you say when your phone is broken? A: my phone is broken

Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

What is stupid and looks like you? You.

why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

jews

I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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