What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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Baby Seal walks into a club.

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Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

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Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

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What do you call a place where all hopes and dreams go to die as this place is contained of depression and the lingering smell of death? www.anti-joke.com

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Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

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So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

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A man walks into a bar and sees another man crying at the other end he asked what's wrong the man replies well its a long story I have time replyed the other man ok well me and my wife are always arguing. So I divided to go to the library after hours of reading I see a book about history and as im reading it its time to go home and when I was going to check it out I forgot my library card I get home and me and my wife make up and have a baby thats not bad at all said the other man yea you've never lost ur library card

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How do you get someone to paid attention to etys You don't, there is no such thing as retys

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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Lukas: can i have a cigarette? Scott: i dont know can you? lukas: may i? Scott: NO

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what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

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A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

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what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

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Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

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Why? Why not?

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BRANDON LUI ROCKSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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