A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

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What is the difference between a dog and pile of dead babies? One of them is alive.

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

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Jewwy Jewstein

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, as speaking to himself is a sign of mental illness.

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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A blonde, a brunnette, and a red head all jump from the top of a building. They all land at the same time because of Newton's 3rd Law

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Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to their son who got an A- in algebra? How do I know? I don't speak Chinese!

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How do you judge a black person? By the content of their character.

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A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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Why did the kid want to do his science test? He didnt, who would want to do a science test...

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? To test the principles of gravity.

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what do you call a gay guy? kevin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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