Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

Whats worse than death? Getting expelled from Hogwarts

Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

A Jew finally tipped He was in a canoe

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

No antijoke here.

Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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