Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Cause he was invited.

Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

Justin beiber comment if u get it

Why did the old man die? He was old.

What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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