A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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whats older than your mom? a tortoise that has been living more than a couple hundred years

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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Whats the leading cause of death Life.

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident.

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What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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Your momma's so fat: She fears a lower life expectancy and consequently not seeing her grandchildren grow up.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

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How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

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why is stu taking so long to post a joke because he is autistic

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Q: What's worse than finding out you have genital herpes? A: Finding out your grandmother gave them to you

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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