What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why are they the "living" daylights?

penis. nuff said.

He--Hey guys

I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

when life gives you lemons... squeeze the juice into your eyes.

What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

Study from real life: My trip to Texas. (From the time when I was interested in mormon-ism.) Texan: And here is my gun collection, great for shootin yer Mexican scum. Me: Uh I am Norwegian but my ancestors where Russian or something so my skin is... Texan: *points gun at me and pushes trigger halfways* Just kidding der son, sure you aint no Mexican though? Okay just checkin ya know... Me *sweating bullets* Texan guys gun go off almost hitting me and breaking a vase.. Conclusion: He blamed me, everyone had lunch outside later, everyone kept looking at the "trigger happy MEXICAN"... Nero: By then I began grasping the fact that I was better suited for the study of the dark arts... And also learned that in Mormonism, Heaven and Hell are planets locked into war, where black people where neutral, and red people are demon supporters, but WE CAN ALL BE SAVED BY BECOMING WHITE! JUST LIKE THE ANGEL MORONI! Conclusion two: Moroni... Lol.

You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

How do you drown a blonde? Weigh her down and throw her into a body of water.

Why did the black man steal the mountain bike? He didn't. He purchased and payed for the mountain bike.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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