Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

what did the mexican do yesterday? bang your mom

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

So three Irish guys walk out of a bar

what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why don't you ask the chicken. I am sorry but I as a human being am totally incapable of understanding and communicating with chickens.

Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...